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Together for Life Online Team

Ritual and Routine Exercise for Spouses

By | Communication, Marriage Enrichment, Romance | No Comments

We’d like to give you an opportunity to strengthen the rituals and routines that bind you together and make you unique as a couple. You’ll have an opportunity to look at or develop the routines you have that make sure you get the time you need to work, play, pray, communicate, and celebrate together. Part I: Rituals A ritual is a regular, scheduled, expected event that enables you to have the time you need to work, play, pray, communicate, and celebrate together. Sit down with your spouse, and consider your relationship. In the blanks below, write the rituals that mean the most to you in the following categories: work, play, prayer, communication, and celebrations. If you don’t have entries for a particular category, discuss rituals you could create to shore up this part of your lives together. Work: Every week, we have regular, scheduled time to work together to keep…

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Prayer for a Simple Kind of Love by Haley Stewart

By | Finding Joy, Marriage Enrichment, Meaning of Marriage, Romance, Spirituality | No Comments

I have trouble sleeping if my husband, Daniel, is out of town. The familiar sound of his breathing as he sleeps beside me is what slows my own breath and beckons me into sleep each night. After fifteen years of marriage, if he is far away it feels as if part of me is missing. “Bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” This is how scripture describes the intimacy of marriage (Gn 2:23). A parent and a child are bound together by blood, but a husband and wife take on this kind of intimacy by choice, reflecting the relationship between God and the Church, his chosen Bride. Through sacramental grace, our spouse—although forever in some ways a mystery to all but God—is made intimately known to us and we to him. The differences between Daniel and me remain a source of wonder, occasional frustration, and frequent bemusement. “You…

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Resentment: Lord, the One You Love is Keeping Score

By | Communication, Family Life, Marriage Enrichment | No Comments

Being Resentful Is Not the Same as Getting Frustrated All of us will experience times of frustration in our relationships. (This is true for all kinds of relationships, but I’m going to focus on romantic partnerships in this part of the book.) After all, we’re constantly learning how to give and accept love, and learning how to love another person as God loves them gives us daily opportunities to see where we’re lacking and where we need to improve. When a partner leaves the toilet seat up or doesn’t take out the trash in time for the morning collection, we might get frustrated. Similarly, when we leave our clothes on the floor or accidentally throw away important paperwork or track mud in the house, our partner might get frustrated with us. That frustration can lead to arguments, and it’s a bad feeling for everyone involved. Again, we’re all trying our…

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Bending So We Don’t Break

By | Communication, Family Life, Finding Joy, Marriage Enrichment | No Comments

My parents have long had a wonderful saying: “Never leave one good party in search of another.” Of course, the adage applied to real parties. My mom and dad were notorious for being the last to leave any social gathering. They were the first on the dance floor and the last to wave goodbye, usually after having stayed around to help clean up. But I learned early on that their wisdom also applied to most of the important things in life: education, career, and especially marriage. When I need an example of a strong marriage, I simply look to my own parents, who have been going strong for fifty years and counting. I won’t say that they never fought, but I will say that they were partners through and through. At the core of their relationship is a mutual covenant to help one another get to heaven and to experience…

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PRAYERS FOR FOSTERING UNITY

By | Communication, Family Life, Finding Joy, Marriage Enrichment, Uncategorized | No Comments

Releasing Unhealthy Attachment with Parents Heavenly Father, I acknowledge that I have not fully left my parents to be joined to my spouse. I now renounce any unhealthy attachment I have with either of my parents. I release them to you, Father, and I ask you to give them the grace to release me. I declare that my primary allegiance is to you and to my spouse. I pray this in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen. Releasing Unhealthy Attachment with Children Heavenly Father, I recognize that I have formed unhealthy attachments with my children, and that this is unhealthy for their growth and development and for my relationship with my spouse. I ask you for the grace to release those unhealthy attachments now, and to form a healthy bond with my spouse, in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen. Renouncing Unholy…

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The Call to Change

By | Communication, Finding Joy, Spirituality | No Comments

Today we celebrate Christ’s triumphal entrance into the holy city of Jerusalem. The crowds laid their cloaks before him and received him as a king and the hopeful fulfillment of Israel’s long wait: “Blessed is the King who comes in the name of the Lord” (Lk 19:38). Immediately upon his arrival in Jerusalem, Christ proceeded to upend the comfortable rhythm of religious practice and leadership. From the cleansing of the Temple to the famous “woe to you, scribes and Pharisees” orations, it quickly became clear that Christ brought zeal for restoring right order and casting out all corruption and hypocrisy. Those who were open to Christ—which included the need to acknowledge the faults of their ways—were able to accompany him in the mighty work that had emblazoned his longing heart through all his earthly ministry. They would be the ones who would also share its fruits. Those whose hearts had…

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Falling in Love by Paul George

By | Communication, Family Life, Finding Joy, Marriage Enrichment, Romance | No Comments

What is more difficult, falling in love or staying in love? I’ve had this question posed to me a few times. The soul awakens when one falls in love. My soul awoke when I fell in love with my wife. Falling in love was easy. Sure, I had some fears and doubts, but as soon as I let go of those, I fell hard. My soul awoke too when I gave my life to Jesus. I sur- rendered. I had questions, doubts, and fears, but once I let go of those, my heart fell in love and broke open. My out- look changed overnight, but changes in my behavior and attitudes took time. I’m still on the journey of healing, growth, and conversion. Love requires more of us than falling. It’s the day-to-day process of loving that develops holy grit within us. We all know the feeling when the romance…

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Turning Good Marriages into Pathways to Glory

By | Meaning of Marriage, Spirituality | No Comments

It’s a Sacrament; It’s a Vocation; It’s a Road map to Heaven! Sacramental marriage “aims at a deeply personal unity, the unity that, beyond union in one flesh, leads to forming one heart and soul.” —Pope John Paul II, Familiaris Consortio Marriage can be good. With effort, it can be very good. But it takes God to make the union glorious—a foretaste of heaven, in a sense. God can help you find the glory in lifelong commitment through all the highs and lows. God calls you together, he binds you together in a mystical way through the Sacrament of Matrimony, and he sets you on the path to heaven. He wants husbands and wives to seek each other’s salvation and redemption by offering all they have without holding anything back.  Sacramental Channels of Grace  The first step in cooperating with God’s beautiful plan for our married lives is to realize…

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Find Love in Small Deeds

By | Communication, Family Life, Finding Joy, Marriage Enrichment, Romance | No Comments

In addition to being kind to ourselves, we also need to open up to the gentle presence of others in our lives. There are so many people who, during the day, care for us through little words of affirmation or other small ways. But we take them all for granted and miss the power of their wonderful support. It may take the form of family and friends saying a kind word. They may call just to let us know they are thinking of us. Or, they may do a small chore for us so we don’t have to do it ourselves. Often these are unrecognized graces. We fail to recognize them because we are used to them, maybe too used to them. Then we miss them when they are gone. Being grateful for the wonderful people in our lives now would certainly change our behavior toward them. As in the…

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Healing for Everyone

By | Family Life, Finding Joy, Marriage Enrichment | No Comments

As the sun was setting, all those who had any who were sick with various kinds of diseases brought them to him; and he laid his hands on each of them and cured them. —Luke 4:40 Throughout the gospels, people arrive with a variety of sufferings for Jesus to heal. No type of ailment or hurt is too little, too large, or too strange for him to tend. He encounters everyone personally—touching them, placing his hands upon them, flesh to flesh, and coming close to the ill, soul to soul. And he does so for each of them. He treats them not as impersonal objects but rather as people who matter, people not only in need of his attentiveness but also worthy of it. Did Jesus fear catching a disease? Did he flinch when he saw festering wounds or smelled the stench of the unbathed? Did he feel repelled by…

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